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有个邮差,有次到一家送信

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  • 2021-07-21
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有个邮差,有次到一家送信,一条狗迎面跑来不停地向他狂叫。那家人不在家,隔壁的妇人打开窗子喊道:“想知道怎么把狗赶走吗?”“当然想,”邮差说,“我怕它会咬我。”妇人说:“你问它要不要洗澡好了。”邮差对著狗,用最温柔的声音问道:“你想舒舒服服地洗个热水澡吗?”狗停了下来,随即沿著马路跑去。邮差问妇人:“它就那么讨厌洗澡啊?”妇人回答:“才不,它喜欢的很,它是赶回家去洗澡呢!”

晚上,正好老婆在家 happy,突然我的电话响了,老婆抓起手机一看,来电显示为,气都不打一处来,马上接听开骂,一骂骂了半个多小时,对方就这样一句话没说静静的听着。老婆:''

上个月男友生病住院,我半搀半抱着他散步,累的我一身汗,给他前女友看见了,老公那个得意又感动:“下次你不方便时我也背你,不嫌累!”前几天我脚扭伤了,走路得慢慢的挪。男友叫我下班了等着他来接,于是我乐滋滋拒绝了同事的顺风车,满心期待等来了老公,他跟我邀功说:“媳妇你看,这拐杖我特意选的,把手有鸳鸯戏水的图案,快试试舒服不?”

儿子:“我英语只考了25分,但是全班分数都很低。”妈妈:“我不管别人考了几分,你考这么低就不行! ”第二天,儿子:“我数学考了90分。”妈妈:“那别人呢?”

女友在网上购物,结果五天未见发货。大怒之下与客服联系:你们太没信誉了!这都五天了还不发货!我要投诉你!客服忙回复:亲,请稍等一下我去查查交易记录。几分钟后,客服倒是态度依然和蔼:亲,原来送货地址写邮箱的就是你啊!幸会幸会。

哥们喜欢一女生,终于有一次,他捧着鲜花,当着全班的面向她表白,女生羞羞的问:“你为什么喜欢我?”哥们说:“虽然你不怎么漂亮,脾气不怎么好,成绩不怎么优秀,在学校也不怎么起眼,甚至属于中下的一个女生,但我一看到你就有种莫名的感觉,我想这就是。。。”“就是你瞎了!”女生把花一扔转身走了

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